We spent a lovely afternoon reading, examining, and writing poetry. I am a long-time aficionado of haiku, as my family knows, as well as tanka, to a lesser degree (of familiarity, not respect or appreciation). Today, I thought we would spend some time on cinquains. But I made a mistake.

A cinquain is a type of Japanese poem. Here’s five things about them:

It’s pronounced sin-cain, not sin-kwayne.
There’s five lines.
The rhyming scheme is 2-4-6-8-2 (syllables per line).
The lines don’t need to rhyme. But they can rhyme. If you want.
You can write about anything. Tell a little story.
1. Line 1 should be the subject (2 syllables)
2. Line 2 is a description of the subject (4 syllables).
3. Line 3 is an action the subject is taking (6 syllables).
4. Line 4 is a feeling the subject has - or you have about the subject (8 syllables).
5. Line 5 is the conclusion. It might be a synonym or other noun for the subject (2 syllables).

When I was caught up in the furor and excitement of learning, reading, sharing, writing these with a 4- and 7-year old, I failed to remember #3. That’s the one about syllables per line. I know this well with haiku (5-7-5) or tanka (5-7-5-7-7). For some inexplicable reason, I began helping them write with word counts instead of syllable counts. And thus do we send our children down dark paths for evermore. Forgive me.

This is what we came up with:

Me (Professor Dad)

Dad
Very strong
Wrestles his sons
He wins, they’re mad.
Father.

Their responses were visceral and vicious. “I don’t like this one,” the elder critic of the duo announced. “It’s mostly about you being happy and us being sad.”

“But,” I said, “it’s also so, so true. Isn’t it?”

And thus are disagreements on the scale of Montagues and Capulets, Hatfields and McCoys, Trump supporters and democracy advocates ignited. We continued:

The 7-year old

Flower
Strong smell
Moves its petals
It blows in wind
Daisy.

(And)

Ketchup
Juicy tomatoes
Squirts onto salad
They’re so very happy
Catsup.

The 4-year old

in homage to A Series of Unfortunate Events:

Violet
Very kind
Carries her sister
Violet mostly invents stuff
Baudelaire

In homage to Star Wars:

C3PO
Super shiny
Talks a lot
Happy when turned on
Android.

——

I rather enjoy these. Perhaps there’s a metaphor or learning moment for parenting and teaching in there. Maybe my takeaway for today is this (tomorrow it would probably be a different one):

Perhaps our mistakes in parenting and teaching will give them something to laugh about, and perhaps they’ll still learn something valuable. Perhaps.

Syllables, Joseph, syllables, not words.

Subject-poetry